A Promise for Keeps
Session Start: Sat Oct 01 21:38:35 2005
Session Ident: Nicotine^
[21:38] ITS NOT!
[21:39] i KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[21:39] * VanillaSkies looks at you
[21:39] take a GOOD hard look at this stupid guy
[21:39] im not worthy
[21:40] im crap
[21:40] i dont even deserve your look
[21:40] why are you saying all of these?
[21:40] just tell me
[21:40] and stop playing games
[21:40] cause i am crap
[21:40] you are not
[21:40] something else
[21:40] and you tell me straight
[21:40] NOW!
[21:41] what do you want me to tell you?
[21:41] only you can answer that
[21:41] What do you need to tell me other than you are a crap
[21:42] other than you are not worthy eh?
[21:42] i love you so much but i know ill end up hurting you cause we are far away
[21:42] ohh
[21:42] you are giving up?
[21:42] you still dont know me do you?
[21:42] sexually active
[21:42] is that so?
[21:43] like the movie
[21:43] no
[21:43] 40 days and 40 nights eh
[21:43] forget that im sexually active
[21:43] andres
[21:43] im making the effort
[21:43] cathy
[21:43] dont just throw it all away
[21:44] im not trying to throw it all away
[21:44] i sometimes am like this
[21:45] i sometimes i dont feel worthy of anything
[21:45] you are always worth of everything
[21:45] you were created
[21:45] you existed for something
[21:45] the bad part is that your actually telling what i say to Guy
[21:45] with a PURPOSE!
[21:46] u tell everyone about us
[21:46] not everything
[21:46] eversince you told me to shut up
[21:46] but i was hurt with what you said earlier
[21:46] well right now guy is giving you advice about this
[21:46] no
[21:46] we stopped talking
[21:47] come on baby u dont need to lie
[21:47] im dealing this with oyou ALONE
[21:47] IM NOT LYING
[21:47] thats all i said
[21:47] to him
[21:47] stop screaming
[21:47] cuz you upset me
[21:47] as if you lack TRUST
[21:47] i DO lack trust
[21:48] you think its easy for me?
[21:48] i can see now no
[21:48] and im losing my trust as well
[21:48] you actually think having a long distance relationship is easy for me?????????
[21:48] no
[21:48] thats why i want to come over
[21:49] then come over
[21:49] andres you have to help
[21:50] im trying
[21:50] i cannot do this just by myself
[21:50] what do you need?
[21:50] invitation
[21:50] the processing of visa
[21:51] plane ticket
[21:51] so i should just open my wallet and say: voilá
[21:51] no
[21:52] we chip in
[21:52] we?
[21:52] look
[21:52] answer me
[21:52] you want me to be with you or not?
[21:53] you sure are a person who likes to pressure
[21:53] okay forget it
[21:53] if you feel pressured
[21:53] i wont pressure you
[21:53] look
[21:53] im looking
[21:53] i said before
[21:54] im in a depressed mood
[21:54] * VanillaSkies nods
[21:54] can you actully feel it?
[21:54] *actually
[21:54] i can see it
[21:54] nooo
[21:54] dont see it
[21:55] FEEL it
[21:55] i see with my eyes and feel it
[21:55] get it?
[21:55] yes
[21:55] u actually want a person like that?
[21:55] nobody is perfect
[21:55] ive had worse than you
[21:56] so dont think your worse
[21:56] or that you are good for nothing
[21:56] i have my flaws as well
[21:57] i wish i could live near by
[21:57] this is just part of it andres
[21:57] no
[21:57] ?
[21:57] im a depressed person
[21:58] proves you to be human
[21:58] no ur not getting it sweetie
[21:58] nobody ever lived without getting depressed
[21:59] you cannt always be on top
[21:59] why do you love me?
[21:59] because my heart tells me
[21:59] and
[21:59] or should i say "why do you love my text?"
[21:59] not your text
[21:59] you as a person
[22:00] you are scared of me andres?
[22:00] you cannot imagine someone is actually loving you for real?
[22:01] its alright
[22:01] i cant
[22:01] :(
[22:01] maybe when im gone you will realize
[22:01] im dead scared
[22:01] but i will be here
[22:01] when ur gone?
[22:02] i know what i feel
[22:02] and i know what i am getting myself at
[22:02] you are not the only one who is scared
[22:02] explain when ur gone?
[22:02] i cannot explain that andres
[22:02] only time will tell you
[22:03] pls do
[22:03] i have no words
[22:03] find some then
[22:03] but know and remember that I love you
[22:03] and that is all i can say
[22:03] i will be here
[22:03] no baby
[22:03] dont leave me like this
[22:03] explain
[22:04] or at least tell me ur will not do something stupid
[22:04] im still very much here andres
[22:04] listen
[22:04] good
[22:04] dont ever take your life away again
[22:04] and im never gonna take my life away again either
[22:05] it's never worth doing so
[22:05] ok baby
[22:05] i promise
[22:05] dont be a loser again
[22:05] but im pretty sure i lost you today didnt i?
[22:05] no
[22:05] or have i lost you?
[22:05] no
[22:06] alright
[22:06] start praying andres
[22:06] for?
[22:06] pls do
[22:06] talk to God
[22:06] speak to him all your fears and anger
[22:07] your hurt and pain
[22:07] ohh
[22:07] i do that
[22:07] likenow
[22:07] i try to
[22:07] nothing to be ashame or hide
[22:07] He knows all
[22:08] i told myself i m never gonna cry
[22:08] NEVER!
[22:08] and I DIDNT!
[22:08] in those 5 years
[22:08] i rarely did
[22:08] just a bit
[22:08] and when it was over
[22:08] no tears flowed
[22:08] u felt better
[22:08] YES
[22:09] i learned to accept it
[22:09] without regrets
[22:09] even when everyone knows we were planning to get married
[22:09] my boss knew
[22:09] but then it went pfff
[22:09] huh¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡
[22:09] ??????
[22:09] it didnt hurt me
[22:09] but you DO hurt me
[22:10] im sorry i hurt you nilli
[22:10] its just the bad side of me
[22:10] its alright
[22:10] not everytime
[22:10] wil be bed of roses for us
[22:10] i take every pain as a challenge
[22:10] i prefer a simple bed with just you beside me
[22:10] makes my heart fonder
[22:11] * VanillaSkies pinches your side
[22:11] BUT you DO made me feel the pain and hurt
[22:12] and what is like to love so real
[22:12] as well to laugh again...
[22:12] and be afraid
[22:12] im so scared
[22:12] so am i
[22:12] i dont know
[22:12] if we will end up together
[22:12] its ALL up to God
[22:13] indeed
[22:14] sorry about today
[22:14] its okay
[22:14] im here not just for good times
[22:14] but as well for bad and the worse to come
[22:14] will u see me go to bed today?
[22:14] yes
[22:14] of course
[22:15] ive been waiting for you
[22:15] do you love me?
[22:15] of course
[22:15] i DO!
[22:15] im stil on yahoo
[22:15] i do love you 2
[22:15] im logging
[22:15] very much
[22:15] i almost lost you today didnt i?
[22:15] give me a hug
[22:15] * Nicotine^ hugs you
[22:16] * Nicotine^ puts his two fingers on his forehead...and moves them slightly
[22:16] LOL!
[22:16] im stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[22:16] lol
[22:16] I love you andres
[22:16] i love you cathy
[22:17] :)
[22:17] No such nick
Session Close: Sat Oct 01 23:00:45 2005
posted by Skies @ 3:21 PM
